THIS SIDE OF 40 by Bry

I'm going to have to take some time this weekend to go back and read some of the entries I made during the period of December 2006 to April 2007. It hasn't been THAT long ago that I wanted (NEEDED!!) a job so bad that I would have been willing to roll around in pig shit as long as it increased my income & made me feel like a real person again.

I need to remind myself how MUCH getting THIS job meant to me and how much I stressed over waiting to hear if I'd gotten it or not!! It would also help for me to read about how excited I was when I actually DID get the job!! You see..if I can remind myself of how desperate I was just a few short months ago then maybe I can get a better outlook on things at work before I end up exploding in the middle of a staff meeting! Here's the story:

I've been getting inundated with emails from my supervisor and his 'mini-me' about some stupid web-based training stuff that's coming due at the end of the month. Since I knew that these training "classes" required a total of 5 hours to complete, I warned my supervisor before I left work yesterday that I'd be spending a good chunk of the day doing this training stuff. So I get to the office this morning & load up the website where the classes are......imagine my surprise when I see a whole LIST of OTHER web-based training classes that were due back in NOVEMBER!! I'd had NO idea that it was due....so I end up having to do THEM before I could start on the OTHER stuff! Incidentally, these newly discovered courses ALSO amounted up to a good 5 hours as well. I said, "fuckit" and started the old stuff.

As is the case with most company training stuff, this stuff was INCREDIBLY boring!! Quite frankly, I really don't give a rat's ass if "Mike" isn't storing volatile chemicals in the right manner. I can't see myself getting upset because "Jan" got her feelings hurt when she walked into the breakroom and overheard a dirty joke. And I *TRULY*, *HONESTLY*, *FOR REAL* don't give a damn if "Marcie" received a picture of a man's hairy chest in an email and got offended. My man Mike needs to be fired, Jan needs to really lighten up, and Marcie needs to get laid and stop being such a bitch.

If watching this crap wasn't enough, it ALSO included a "knowledge test" at the end of the show...presentation...whatever you want to call it. The tests at the end of each lesson were as humdrum as the training material itself. Yes, I passed all of the tests. Yay. I feel REALLY special now.

About midway through the classes, I looked at my watch and saw it was already 11:45...I figured that since my eyes were crossing anyway I'd just stop the lesson and attempt to get some work done. The day just went to shit from there.

A little later I came back from lunch and was just beginning to start everything up when my supervisor plunks down on my desk and starts the whole, "why is your work late?" game that we've been playing for the last what seems like 20 years. At first he asked me if I needed someone to come over and 'show me how to organize' my day, to which I replied by asking if I wasn't doing my job correctly. He said no, but then asked me if I'd like to have someone take over about 1/4 of my area for a few weeks until I get ahead on things.

No, dipshit. I want to sit here and continue to risk an ulcer (which by the way could literally KILL me!) by worrying about being 2 weeks behind.

Once that was over with, along comes the IT man to brighten my day by announcing that the folks up in quality control ("this call may be monitored for quality assurance") had called in a repair ticket on my computer. Apparently they couldn't see what is on either of my monitors or hear what I was saying. We ALL know how critical it is for Big Brother to be able to see AND hear what you're doing......for quality control of course. Well the IT guy checks everything out and can't find any problems. Big Brother is apparently going to have to just deal with not being able to see and hear me for a while I guess.

THEN along comes the cherry on top of my day. I, along with 2 other folks, get an email from my supervisor basically telling us that we're expected to produce a minimum of 10 appointments per day or else. I swear...I think that my head literally blasted off of my shoulders in a cloud of flames and thick smoke after reading that email!! Luckily it turns out that the email had been prompted by someone else above my supervisor and he had actually NOT turned into the world's biggest jerk in the matter of a few hours.

When 5:30 FINALLY rolled around, I found myself running as fast as I could to get to my truck and go home!! One more minute in that place and I'd have just curled up and DIED.

So...how was YOUR day??!!