Not much to talk about tonight...mainly because I'm kinda pooped! It's been a long day....I didn't have to work, but had to do a lot of running around with errands and such....one of which was traveling to Raleigh to re-do my I-9 form...I had to drive 35 minutes to do something that only took a total of 60 seconds! Oh well...it could have been much worse I guess.

I made a video of my last ever trip to my grandmother's house today...I did amazingly well. Although that's partly because my cousin's wife was with me...that made it much easier. Even though I realize that it's only a house, I still had to say my goodbyes. I think it's safe to say that I'll never even drive by the place anymore...it would be just way too painful to see someone else living there that's not family. Walking around in there today I realized that even though it hurts to see the place go, it probably is for the best...the place was in pretty bad disrepair since my grandmother lived there. My Uncle hadn't kept the place in any kind of decent shape after Nannie died. Things were really falling apart, so I guess that I can't fault my cousin TOO much for selling it off....

Well, that's about it for tonight! I'm off to bed...have to be at work at 6:45 in the morning! BLECH!

I had the most bizarre thing happen today. I strongly believe that I was GROPED at work! Although I can't really be sure because it was one of those things that happened in such a way that it could easily be brushed off as an "accident", but maybe not so much because it happened TWICE! It seems that a co worker and I ended up in quite close proximity to each other while trying to navigate around the desk area, and well, we ended up in such a position that a certain part of my anatomy ended up literally being somewhat HELD! She was trying to retrieve a notebook from a bottom shelf while I was standing at the counter, and well, it just ended up being more than a notebook that she ended up with. Neither of us said anything, and I just figured it was an occupational hazard or something. Until about an hour later and it happened again..only this time I heard a distinct "wow"! Of course, being who I am (yeah folks, I am for the most part the same in person as I am on here) I asked her if it was as good for her as it was for me, and she said, "I just never figured a skinny boy to have that much!" For the first time in a VERY long time, I was speechless!

So, after being molested, I encountered my first bizarro person for the day: it seems that Ms. Snobbalina Imindebt is fixing up her bathroom in her overpriced house in the fashionable subdivision and decided that the sink she'd special ordered just wasn't as good as everyone else's in the neighborhood, so she wanted a refund. Now, on the paperwork in bold letters is the statement that special orders can not be brought back for a refund unless the product is defective. Twenty minutes later, this woman is trying to convince me that her dislike of the sink was cause for it to be considered defective. Sorry, lady..no dice. She left in a really bad mood...and with her sink, vowing never to return. I only hope she's sincere because I really don't like pretentious people at all.

Then there was the man who drove up on what I call the "I'm too damn lazy to walk" cart. You know what I'm talking about..the motorized cart with the basket on the front. Well, I've YET to see a TRULY disabled person use that thing, hence my nickname for it. Anyway, this man comes toodling up to the desk and throws an envelope onto the counter and announces he wants to pay on his credit card. So I punch in the info on the computer and ask him how much he'd like to pay...he whips out a credit card and says he wants to pay $20....I explain to him that our store doesn't allow credit card payments to be made using another credit card...five minutes later, I finally convince him that I'm not lying and he hands me cash. Just when I thought I'd seen the last of him, a little while later, he WALKS up to the counter and announces that he's injured himself on the motorized cart. It seems that when he tried to park the thing and get off it, his enormous beer belly flopped down onto the control and made the thing back over his big toe, which was now bleeding profusely! I did feel a bit sorry for him, but at the same time I was having a hard time deciding which grossed me out more...the blood pouring out of his foot, or how ugly his feet were in general! They looked like they'd already been in a meat grinder! Folks, those were some UUUUUGGGGGLLLLY feet!

Now for some other news....
I'm still pounding away on the new website...in fact, I'm adding a link to it over on the "sites I like" section. I've gotten some pretty positive feedback on it, so let me know what you think! There's a spot on it for a blog, but since I don't see myself leaving Blogstream anytime soon, the blog there is just for comments on the site.

Also....
Tomorrow's the day that I'll HOPEFULLY know FOR SURE, WITHOUT A DOUBT about the new job. Seriously, I think with all the praying and hoping I've done lately that I am in the running to be a priest now..or at the very least a nun!

Well, that's it for tonight..time to go do some stalking! I'm thinking that I'll get a good show when I peek in on Candy and Bella! WOO HOO!

My store has the coolest thing...when the store is closed, there's a keypad located outside the door that you can simply push in a code and the doors pop open! It's extremely convenient because it saves the employee the hassle of having to call into the store for someone to open the door or having to beat on the door to get someone's attention. It also saves management the hassle of having to drop what they're doing to come and open the door.

Of course, things being ass backwards as they are at my store, the door is never completely unlocked, making the handy little keypad absolutely USELESS. Such was the case this morning. I arrived at the crack of dawn for work, and as usual, I had to break out the cell phone and call the manager to come and open the door...his comment: "I wish that you guys would use the keypad to get in when you're scheduled this early." My retort: "I wish you would stop disabling the thing so that I wouldn't have to waste my minutes calling you to the door when I'm scheduled to come in this early!" As you can tell, I'm not one who easily holds his tongue when confronted with stupid comments.

I should have just turned around at that point and gone back home, but being the gluten for punishment that I am, I stayed. The first really super cool FUN thing that happened was the South American bitch (note the word BITCH) who approached me with 3 dead plants and 4 live plants. It seems that she killed the 3 plants, had gotten a refund on them, and now wanted to purchase the other plants for the same price as what she paid for the ones she killed. When I explained to her that the ones she wanted to buy were priced higher than the ones that she killed, she proceeded to tell me, "you don't understand what I'm saying." Clearly, she mistook ME for the one who didn't understand English, so I asked her to 'explain' it once more. Her words: "I want to purchase these plants for the same price as the plants that have died."

I explained to her that yes, I did understand exactly what she was saying, and that she needed to listen very closely to what -->I<-- was saying: "The plants you want to buy are more expensive than the ones you killed, and therefore you will have to pay the higher price unless you want identical plants to the ones you killed." This is when it got interesting. She begins to tell me over and over that I wasn't understanding what she was saying, to which I kept replying, "you are not getting the plants at the same price as the others." It was quite entertaining for the passersby who overheard the exchange. Apparently Ms. South America thought that she was going to wear me down. She was mistaken. Fifteen minutes later, she threw up her hands, said something in her native language and stood and stared at me...."You can say whatever you like in any language that you like, but you're still not getting the plants for the cheaper price." Then it was MY turn to stare at her blankly.

Yes. I won.

She turned with a huff and stormed out the door as I exclaimed, "Have a nice day!" Yes, I'm quite an asshole when the situation warrants it.

I had a conversation with my new employer today. One obstacle down, one to go. My drug test came back clean...no big shock there. So that just leaves the background check, which should be back in a day or so. It is sheer torture waiting for something like this when you have absolutely NO patience whatsoever! Now if THAT isn't bad enough, I have to travel 30 minutes this Wednesday to complete a task that will take all of 30 seconds. GAAAAHHHHH! It seems that providing the copy of my ID and SS card has to be done by a real live human, and the closest office of the agency that got me this job is quite a haul from where I live. I'll tell you what..if I didn't want this job so bad, I'd be really pissed right about now. Sheesh!

So, to leave you all with a chuckle....how about the old man who came wandering up to the service desk today, asked me where he could buy some fertilizer for his garden, and let out the loudest fart I've heard in all my 37 years on this Earth.

He didn't miss a beat and said, "well, it seems like if I wait about another five minutes, I can make my own!" My response: "I was just thinking the VERY same thing!"



P.S. ::::::: Just so everyone knows, I've been working for the last few weeks on my own website, and it's finally LIVE!!! If you all out there like my blog entries, then you'll really like the site! Of course, I also appreciate feedback on it...suggestions for content, etc.

PPS:::::: The address for the site is http://lifewithbry.brainuse.com/

I have been officially diagnosed with "Short Timer Syndrome"...a condition that affects those who are in the process of leaving their job...this is according to a co-worker that I have confided in about my plans to leave my current job. She must be right, because I simply did NOT want to be at work today!! All I could think about was the fact that this hopefully will be the LAST weekend that I will be working at the customer service desk!! My anticipation was only compounded when I arrived at work today and checked the upcoming schedules (this place makes their schedules out a MONTH in advance!) and found that there is one day that I am scheduled to come in at 10am, work for two hours, then drive an hour to a neighboring city's store, take some stupid training class for an hour, drive an hour back to my home store, and then work the rest of my shift. How STUPID is that??!!!

If THAT wasn't enough to start my day off on the wrong foot, on further inspection of the schedules, I found that there are several days that I am going to be expected to work my entire shift ALONE. Now, anyone who has ever worked at a customer service desk in a retail store that brings in over a million dollars a week will tell you that things shouldn't be happening that way. In fact, it's already happened several times in the last two months, and when I have brought the "error" to the management's attention, I've been very bluntly told, "deal with it"....which is one of the main reasons that I resumed my job search in the first place! Come to find out, one of the reasons that I'm being expected to work alone for all those shifts is because all of my co-workers in the area have requested the days off...at the same time...and were granted the time off! How stupid is THAT??!! Yes, I realize that's life in the retail game, but it still doesn't excuse blatant stupidity when it comes to making out a schedule.

On the customer front:

*****A man comes in and proclaims after standing in line for five minutes that he's actually been waiting for FIFTEEN minutes, and decides that he is going to come BEHIND the counter to 'speed things up'.....when I saw him doing this, I told him that he will have to leave from behind the counter and wait his turn in line, to which he said, "make me". Of course, one page to security got him into gear, and he proceeded to take his place at the back of the line. While standing in line again, he was very vocal about his dissatisfaction about having to wait....of course by this time he claimed to have been waiting for THIRTY minutes. Luckily, I wasn't the only one who was annoyed with him, because the guy who was standing in front of him turned and said, "why don't you just shut the fuck up or come back at a time when the store isn't so busy?!" The man who'd been whining stood there for a second and then turned and walked out the door! I considered applauding him, but I figured that the snickers coming from the rest of the people in line was enough praise for him!

*****A lady is standing in front of a display of one of those 'bistro' sets...it's a set of chairs and small table that you put onto a patio. Anyway, this display is about five feet off the ground, with a guard bar to prevent anyone from toppling the display onto their head. Well, this genius comes in and proceeds to inspect the display and then starts to try and pick up one of the chairs up over the guard bar. As she brought the chair up, she looked around and saw three of us looking at her. One of my co-workers warned her that she shouldn't try to pick the chair up over the guard bar because the display could become unstable. The lady put the chair down and acted as though she was looking at another display below the bistro set. Guessing what she was up to, the three of us continued to watch her, and sure enough, within a minute, she'd picked the chair up again. This time though, when she picked the chair up, it hit the table and the table toppled over onto her arm. Luckily the table had been secured down by a strap attached to the base, or she would have been conked on the head. Can any of you guess WHY this lady did something that she'd been warned not to do? Yep....lawsuit. The worst part is that where the display is set up is right in the line of sight of a security camera. She may or may not be able to sue and get some money, but frankly, if I were a judge in that case, I'd put her in jail for being stupid.

*****Then there's the woman who brings in her screaming toddler. This kid apparently is 'quite a handful', according to the child's mother. At least that's what I think she said...it was a bit difficult to know for sure because the child was screaming at the top of his lungs while she was trying to talk to me! The reason that the child was so upset? He didn't get the toy he wanted while they were in Walmart before they came into my store. Ok, just for the record...that's not a child who is a 'handful'...that's what I commonly refer to as a BRAT. I'm going to sound like the world's biggest cliche, but when I was this kid's age, if I would have thrown a fit like that in a store, my mother would have beat the shit out of me in the store and then again when we got home! I know this because I remember more than once getting my ass beaten because I acted like a brat in public! Of course, these days if a parent spanks their child they can expect a visit from social services!!

Well, that's about it for tonight folks. I hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Well, I've got to work from 1p-10p today: I will be SOOOOOOOO glad when I don't have to work weekends anymore! Of course, I could have quit the home improvement store from hell already, but I don't want to push my luck...yeah, I have the other job, but knowing my luck, if I were to quit my current job right now, SOMETHING would go wrong and I'd be screwed!

So at least until next week I have to bear the drudgery of the customer service desk! If that's not bad enough, after working until 10p this evening, I have to turn around and be BACK at 9 in the morning! Damnit.

I suppose I'm being paid back for something horrible I did in a previous life...or in a previous decade at least!

Well, that's it for today...hope everyone's having a good weekend!!